Kind Eyes

In the past month, I was on a Retreat.  Not the kind of retreat I have experienced before where 50 to 60 women gather to learn, laugh and eat a lot!  This retreat of mine was an unexpected one.  I traveled alone to China. I left Wednesday and arrived Thursday night.  And on the way back, I left Tuesday and arrived on Tuesday!  It's an interesting experience to lose a day of life and then repeat a day of life.  But in both cases...as I traveled, I was totally alone.  For 24 hours in both directions, I was alone with my thoughts, my fear, my impressions of those around me.  And I was very aware of the Voice inside of me.

I got a little lost in one airport in China and I got little nervous in the Inchon, Korea airport yet the voice within me was strong and constant.  It's strange and lonely to travel to a country where you have no ability to communicate.  I couldn't order my food, I couldn't talk with the taxi drivers, I couldn't even spend money (that's another whole story!) but I could see.  I could take in all the hundreds and thousands of travelers.  I could hear snippets of foreign conversations.  I could see eyes.

Eyes of laughter, eyes full of tears, eyes of confusion, eyes of anger, eyes of joy and love, eyes of celebration, eyes that averted my eyes, eyes that stole glances at me, eyes that were nervous to approach me.  My eyes were full of confusion, and tears at times.  My eyes were observant as I searched for gate numbers and directions!  My eyes drank-in all that I could, wanting to understand the place and the people.  They were shy with me and I was shy with them.  The separation between us seemed huge and impassable.

And where oh where was my luggage?  How does one read a board announcing your luggage location when it's written in Chinese?  How is it 2:30 a.m. on either Wednesday or Thursday??  What day is it?  How is it that I was there but searching for luggage!!  No ones eyes were meeting mine which was fine as I didn't know the language to even ask!  Look, keep looking...surely, you'll see a flight number.  I see many people waiting outside for their family and friends to join them.  My eyes are tired...what shall I do?

And then, a voice calls my name...Kathy!  My eyes behold my one friend.  She's broken through security to seek me out and find me and help me (the security guard was with her!).  My precious, precious sister.  I met this girl two years ago in Tuscaloosa and we were first friends and now spiritual sisters.  What was so foreign was now so familiar, so sweet.  Her kind eyes, loving eyes welcoming me to her city and her country and her world.  Why was I afraid?  Am I so fearful of people and things that look different from me?  Am I so afraid to see things with new eyes?  Can I ever fully trust that the Voice of His is inside me, loving me and guiding me?  Can you?

I want to have kind eyes.  I want to welcome people in my world who feel outcast, without purpose, scared, ashamed and afraid.  He says He lives inside us.  He says He came to give us life and give it abundantly.  He says we are His chosen.  He says love them like I love you.  He says don't look away, don't avert your eyes.  See people.  And let Him see me...see you.  His eyes are always searching to love you right where you are today.

"That’s why, when I heard of the solid trust you have in the Master Jesus and your outpouring of love to all the followers of Jesus, I couldn’t stop thanking God for you—every time I prayed, I’d think of you and give thanks. But I do more than thank. I ask—ask the God of our Master, Jesus Christ, the God of glory—to make you intelligent and discerning in knowing him personally, your eyes focused and clear, so that you can see exactly what it is he is calling you to do, grasp the immensity of this glorious way of life he has for his followers, oh, the utter extravagance of his work in us who trust him—endless energy, boundless strength!  Ephesians 1:15-19 The Message